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Manchester United 0 Everton 1
Dave. Dave! DAVE! Dave, come and have a look at this for us. No, a close look. That’s it. Does that grass look greener to you? If that comes across […]
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Arsenal 1 Everton 1
London’s a very big place Mr Shadrach, a very big place. A man could lose himself in London. Lose himself. Lose himself in London. Not Everton though. The Mighty Blues […]
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Fulham Preview
Let’s do it for Martin Jol. You have to feel for the big Dutchman don’t you, when you think of him on that crisp, fateful morning, turning into the training […]
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Everton 4 Fulham 1
As ‘wake up calls’ go, a 4-1 win that takes you up into fourth place is far from the worst sort. Despite Roberto Martinez’s warnings about taking Fulham lightly though, […]
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Swansea Preview
‘The English language is the wall that divides us, and ‘fuck’ is my chisel’ – Tommy Tiernan, 2008 Right then, Swansea City away. It’s going to be a short one […]
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Swansea and Sunderland and That
Big wheel keep on turning. This is being written dead late by which time you’ve read every last match report online or if you’ve not got a computer you’ve at […]
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Sunderland and Southampton and That
The games are officially coming all Darren Huckerby now – that’s right, ‘thick and fast’ – so once again we adopt the lazy-arse scattergun approach of talking about what’s going […]
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Everton 4 Queens Park Rangers 0
Previously, on This Is Not Football… Right, so after we got beat by Sunderland we had a hard game against Southampton, especially with a couple of big players suspended, but […]
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Norwich City Preview
Thanks for all the messages informing us that a raw, unfiltered version of this preview was released onto the market in error on Thursday night. Rumours have it that a […]
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Everton 2 Norwich City 0
Welcome to Goodison Park. Wipe your feet and leave the points at the door. Chris Hughton’s Norwich were simply the latest in a long line of barbecue-coated Christians thrown to […]
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Transer Frenzy
Hey there, it looks as if a lot of the transfer window courtship is starting to get real and it will soon be time for clubs to actually book a […]
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West Bromwich Albion Preview
‘First they came for the Geordies and I did not speak up, because I was not a Geordie. Then they came for that terrifying kid who supported Leeds and was […]
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West Bromwich Albion 1 Everton 1
A point away at a traditionally quite tough place, against a side out to impress a new manager, wouldn’t normally be sniffed at. However, with Liverpool dropping points at home […]
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Stevenage Preview
Right then, first thing’s first. Own up. Come on, we’re not going on until you do. One of you knows who it was. According to the admin tools of this […]
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Stevenage and the Derby and That
‘Don’t look down, lad. Don’t look down. I’ve got some good news for you and some bad news. The good news is that it’s not soft tissue damage…’ The tale […]
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Liverpool 4 Everton 0
Is it safe to look yet? Have they stopped scoring? Just where do you start with a night like that? Remember against Queens Park Rangers, when we said that Antolin […]
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Everton 2 Aston Villa 1
Winning this game probably isn’t that significant in the big sweep of things. Losing though, that would have felt catastrophic, Continue reading →
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Spurs Preview
Gameweek 25 in the Premier League and it’s all to play for, boys and girls. And yeah, that is gameweek, Continue reading →
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Swansea City Preview FA Cup Special
Let’s win this sucker for Ric Wee. With home advantage, at least two of the ‘big guns’ going out and Continue reading →
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Chelsea Preview (and Swansea and that)
Apart from mad twattings, open goal misses by Hugo Rodallega and hilarious Steven Caldwell mishaps at the back, Roberto Martinez’s Continue reading →
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